somber day

today, of all days, is a bad day all the way around. i murdered a bird today. i was driving on 300W in Wells county. it was beautiful - a very snowy day, the sky was the same color as the ground broken up by a dark brown tree line.. separating it saying, hey, this here, this is where the ground starts and the sky ends. (or vice versa). and there were winter birds all around. i saw sparrows and a few finches and one hundred thousand Snow Buntings. and i hit one. i hit it so hard that it's little bird neck broke and it stayed in the grill of my little Jet Toyota. i didn't know this. i didn't know any of this until i got out of my car at my next appointment. Imagine my surprise when i looked back at my car and a beautiful seasonal bird was hanging out of my grill. so, i did what any reasonable person would do - i cried. quickly. because i wanted to be professional at my appointment. but i did cry. i said a small little prayer, but right here, right now, i want to say a few words for the life i took today.

That bird, she was a good bird. Flying around and making the world, or at least 300 W in Wells county, a prettier more dainty place. Thank you for doing that. Also, please forgive me for smashing into you at 45 miles an hour. It wasn't kind of me. I would never have done it, it seems it was something that was out of my control. God is sad that you are gone, your bird family is sad that you are gone and I am sad that you are gone. I love you.


in a lighter note, look at this cute little owl: it's a Saw Whet owl. i've never seen one and i swear, i'll try very hard not to kill one.